"ogni giorno è buono per nascere; ogni giorno è buono per morire"

This just appeared in my inbox and I couldn't resist it:

THE SMALL ARTS GROUP DIE-OFF
SUNDAY, JANUARY 13, 2008 --A feature of ‘Al’s Crockpot’ at OUTPOST
186 Hampshire St., Cambridge, Massachusetts (enter rear door on side path)
Doors open at 8 pm for Chili, gathering…8:30 pm Die-Off begins

Is your small arts group feeling hopeless?  Tired of bashing your head against the wall? Do you suffer from artistic depression? According to the latest report of the Boston Foundation, if your small arts group’s “vision either dissipated or lost its resonance with its audience or  supporters,” you should think about pulling the plug.  Of course, you’ve thought of ending it all before, but now a Major Player in the Boston arts scene is calling out to you with an expensive new study.  Look deep into your heart.  Consider how fruitless it all seems. Think of the burden that will be lifted from your shoulders if you answer their call for small arts groups to die. No one wants to go first.  But after that, it gets easier, and if enough groups expire, the ones that live on will be stronger and help Boston be a world-class city.  Wouldn’t it be easier if groups went together, all at once?  Come and join us. Represent your small art group – whether real or imagined.  Together, we will inspire one another to perform our ultimate acts in a loving circle of small-art-group friendship.

A $5 donation helps to pay for free Kool-Aid and further die-offs.
For more encouragement, go to responsibleart.org
To see the report, go to tbf.org  Sign a PETITION (see below) at: ipetitions.com/petition/BFsmallarts
For More Info: Funeral Director: Ian MacKinnon, 617-491-8971,
artezani@verizon.net

And the petition:

Dear Boston Foundation,

We are inspired by your recent report on Boston cultural groups, Vital Signs. Now we are calling on you to put your money where your mouth is.  You recommend that some small arts groups dissolve. Well, the fact is that funerals cost money. It can be expensive to turn off the lights. We would hate to think that you would issue a report saying some should die off without offering to help them put themselves out of their misery. Small arts groups that choose to go to the great beyond will be giving their lives so that the arts scene of Boston will be stronger and our city will be seen as World-Class. Often when small arts groups die, there is little closure and bitterness prevails. Instead, they can be encouraged with financial support for final performances and/or paying the last phone bill. They can die with dignity. Perhaps, if the cause truly moves you, you could even fund an artistic float on First Night memorializing the small arts groups that answered your call.

We, the undersigned, are putting an end to it all, considering it, or sympathizing with those who are doing so. Just think: If you gave a mere $10,000 in 20 $500 grants, 20 groups would be encouraged to die off, be it by grand farewell or neat demise. Other groups, idly thinking of the ultimate sacrifice, could be given the push they need. If that $10,000 does not work, then a new round of Encouragement Grants could be given until arts groups of all sizes have the right funding climate here in Boston.  Oh, and by the way, could you outline what your ideal innovative start-up is in case anyone wants to start a group that could justify your funding something small and new again?

If anyone goes, send a report.  Until then, this gets filed under "modest proposals."